It’s tough

It’s tough to hold your head up

when you’re too dumb to chime in

and speak up and contribute to the conversation and

the thing is you’re not really dumb

you just feel things stronger than you can speak them

and then you can’t find the words

you’re not dumb, really

but it feels that way.


It’s tough to be rolling up on fifty

and still think you are thirty

and still think your hair is long and black

and your legs are still nice and lean

and then you get a glimpse of yourself in the mirror

and some hag is looking back.

It’s tough to get old

and become invisible

but when you feel like a hag

then you’ll take invisible

because it’s better than being seen.


It’s tough to not have the answers

and not have the money

and not have the looks

and not have geez-whatever it is you’re supposed to have

and well, that keeps changing

One day it will be cool to be gray and plump and sweet and dumb

until then I will have to wait.

Waiting is tough.


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